Love Story: The Beginning part 2

• I'm going to use initials from now on.
  

Never would I have thought meeting 2 people would change my life so drastically. I hope it doesn't sound like I'm giving anyone too much, but things have changed so much since I met these 2. I am not a really outgoing person I like to stay in my comfort zone. ML is the type that does what he wants and I don't think that will ever change. So when I met it and he invited me to chill with him and DM I was kind of excited. They were very relatable like-minded people as far as music and interest I found myself saying "me too" often. We became close during this fashion show and I never suspected that they were dating, even though I was dropping them off at the same house every night late at night. I was so naïve and a part of me think I was making myself that way. I think I had a crush on both of them which is natural and I feel like they both had and a crush on me, and that's fine until I met CW. CW was too fly nice face, car, body, style, swag, everything u could superficially want from someone he possessed. I was in love. Or at least I thought I was. CW has the cherry y'all, sigh. I was 19 and I don't regret much, but I regret that situation. I will blame it on youth, but I never want my desire to cloud my judgment again, it's a sign a weakness. There was a bit mess Between DM, CW, and I. I feel after I started dealing with him my life changed so much. There was a mix of sexual liberation and social withdrawal. I began lying about my whereabouts, who I was with, what I was doing. And I felt like among my peers I was becoming a ghost, a shell of my former self. Which I was but I was loving it back then. It wasn't and still isn't anyone's business what I was doing. CW had my mind and my body and he didn't take it I gave it to him. A "Grade A" mess! I was introduced to about 3 of his ex's by him. We were walking around claiming I was his cousin to cover up our secret which wasn't really a secret to anyone but me. This around December 2006 by this point I was went to my first gay club, I started smoking, and was neglecting the people around me. DM and ML had broken up by this point and DM wasn't really a part of the group it had gotten quite messy between the four of us. I don't remember anything from that break accept my wisdom tooth causing me so much pain and talking to CW on the phone constantly. Seeds were being planted that winter for the spring.